At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
