I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
