Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
All the doctor said was why
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
