hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
