I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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