can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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