five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
