i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
