Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
