FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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