I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
