I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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