so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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