I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize