I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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