This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
