Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Randomize
