You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
