@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
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