Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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