ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
this will be a night to untag.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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