I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
