I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
