So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
