Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
