I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
