got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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