ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Randomize
