I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
