IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I want her autograph on my taint
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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