apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
