is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Randomize
