who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
