They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
