Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Pants 0. Shit 1.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
