I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
