too bad you live with your parents still
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
