Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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