I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
