Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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