try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Randomize