Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Another day, another engagement, another cat
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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