It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
