did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
