I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
