so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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