Need sex. Gaining weight.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
