Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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