I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
