i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
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